Have the confidence to stand out from the crowd - don't be molded!

February 28 2016

Who or what has a say in how you should be? Our (girls') conditioning starts from a very young age. First it's usually our parents; and if they don't teach us correctly, then we have more chance of letting other sources (and usually not good ones), influence us. Unfortunately, in today's world, society dictates what we do and how we are. 

Here's the question I have for you: Are you brave enough to break away from the crowd and be different? If we let other people dictate who we are, you also allow the opportunity for insecurity to creep in, because you rely on other people's opinions instead of your own. 

With the situation my mother was in, there have been so many questions that have gone through my mind: if she had thought for herself a little bit more, would she have landed herself in the situations that she did? Thankfully, when I grew up, I had a better influence to look up to - my Godmother Raiden.

One last thing: Be careful of the people you surround yourself with, as they will have a hand in the decisions you make as well.

Here's hoping to a better future,

Morven. 

Where do your priorities lie?

February 21 2016

Unfortunately, my mother didn't have anyone to steer her in the direction she should have gone, which is why she landed up where she did. Thankfully I had a different upbringing - with a Godmother like Raiden - I had the opportunity to make better choices, even though I could have easily chosen to follow the path that my mother had walked. 

It's important to have someone in your life that leads you on the right path.Some decisions should be thought about for quite awhile - a couple of months - before you decide on what you want, because believe it or not, you pay for decisions made in the moment. Be careful of the things/people you invest in - there's a lot of energy/emotional drainers out there - that's going to need your constant attention. Boundaries and common sense are very good to have - make sure you develop them.

There should also be a particular order to the things you achieve. For instance - finish school to get a job. Have a stable job before getting involved in a serious love relationship (since a relationship consumes a lot of time). Have a stable love relationship before deciding on getting married and having kids. 

Making these sort of decisions out of the order I've mentioned is usually just a recipe for disaster - that end up in bad regrets. Life experience and self-awareness also counts for a lot - it can ensure that you make better decisions. 

Here's hoping to a better future,

Morven. 

The Relationship with my Mother

February 14 2016

The relationship with my mother wasn't the greatest. She literally had to bring me and my brother up herself since my dad wasn't really around. And then on top of that she had to work as well.

Early on I had learnt what mistakes not to make later on. That's one thing she (unconsciously) taught me. The rest my Godmother, Raiden, taught me. But unfortunately, by the time I finished school, I couldn't wait to get out of the house. As soon as I could, I got myself odd jobs around my hometown, and tried to put money away for some sort of college education later. 

Sometimes I felt that if my mother had been stronger in character, I wouldn't have had to literally bring myself up, with the help of my Godmother of course. 

Now that she's passed on, I feel that she's in a better place. She's made peace with the past and all the things she did (and didn't do). At the end of the day, I didn't have the relationship with my mother that I should have had, though my upbringing could have been worse, it wasn't as bad as some kids I've read about.

And so far, I've lived up to the character that I've built up in myself, and let me tell you, it's not so hard to have character and to live it like some people might make it out to be. 

Here's hoping to a better future,

Morven. 

Friendships

February 7 2016 

I'm quite sure that you've had a friendship with someone that has basically been your lifeline?

In my childhood, it was my Godmother, Raiden. She always gave me good advice, especially when my mom wasn't in a position to do so.

Later in life (basically when I started working), Terra became my friend, the person I went to when I was happy, sad, angry whatever I was feeling at the time. And it was very therapeutic. I believe in keeping your friends for as long as possible. There are going to be times when you lose a friend, for various reasons, but on the whole, friendships should be for life.

When family life is hard, you know you can always go to your friends.

Oh - and another piece of advice: always choose a friend that will speak common sense into you, even if you don't want to hear it.

Here's hoping to a better future,

Morven.