A letter to young people

November 18 2015

My mother wrote this letter a few months after she had me, to warn young people what they can encounter if they have a child in not-such-ideal circumstances. I haven't got a child myself, but I have seen plenty of people my age and a lot younger (unfortunately) that have been in this situation. Kids today don't realize what a HUGE responsibility having a child is. Here's the letter she wrote:

There's nothing easy about raising a child, and this is why I suggest you have quite a bit of life experience behind you before you have one. Have proper values, morals and standards in place, so that you can emulate this to your child and pass it onto them. Another thing: there are TWO parents for a reason; no one should have to be a single parent; so choose your parenting partner VERY carefully, since they will be helping you raise the child - similar values, morals, standards and viewpoints on how to raise the child will be a great help, and make sure they realize the sort of responsibility they're taking on.

I hope you realize that it is costly to raise a child, and that you have the life experience and maturity to raise them. A stable home life is very important. Teach them values like respect, patience, empathy, compassion, how to make the correct choices, confidence, discipline, appreciation, how to forgive, honesty, responsibility, self esteem and trust. Teach them to understand love, because in this society, love is shallow and fleeting. Teach them to respect sex the way it should be done: in a marriage. Teach them what traits they should look for in a partner, and those to avoid. 

I hope you realize that you'll be giving up your previous way of life for this child; that you can't go out whenever you want, stay out as late as you want, and just dump the child by someone else to take care of, and I hope that you're mature enough to take this in stride. You're going to be giving up a lot of things to take care of this child; it's not just your needs anymore, your child's needs come before yours.

And I hope that your child is one of those that grow up to teach those same things to their children.

-Perrine.